on dreaming and being the dream

dream lofty dreams, and as you dream,
so shall you become.
your vision is the promise
of what you shall one day be;
your ideal is the prophecy
of what you shall at last unveil.
- James Allen



let’s be real - having dreams can be difficult
in the face of reality.
sometimes the demands of everyday life -
work, family, money, etc.
- can make it hard not only to achieve dreams,
but even to think of them.

but that is not the case with Emily.

like many school kids of Baao, Emily dared to dream.
and now she is the dream.



i have not really been close to her,
what with the generation gap!
(don’t ask me my age, but if you insist,
i will tell you. Do you insist now?
ok.
i will be 46, 17 days from now.
w.o.w.
am proud to be a 46-er.)
but when Jane asked her if she could be my F.A.R.M. girl,
she right away, without hesitation,
without questions, said yes!
i was actually surprised, she said yes, i mean,
she is all that and more,
all those credits i have seen on Broadway posters,
and words i have heard about her.
why will she say yes?
i am a doubter, no doubt.



so while i was downloading the gorgeous pictures she was sending me,
so i could launch her to be my F.A.R.M. girl,
i was put on a reflective mood/mode, whatever. . .
and TG, Jane was online, otherwise,
i would be talking alone, as most of the time i do
(not that i am losing it,
but that am alone most of my time).
so, like any other time that i am in my introspective state,
questions bombard me unpityingly.
and like most times,
the Force does not answer me back,
no,
not with human words.
he leaves me in my thoughts and trusts
that i will come up with the right realizations.
afterall, he equipped me with my conscience and my will,
so,
what else would i need?
those are the only two things we have that he cannot meddle with,
even if he is the Force.

am i blabbering nonsense now? i think i am. not.

i asked Jane to help me with an answer,
all i could get from her were:
“am crying right now”.
hah! just when you needed an intelligent friend,
she fails you.
but this goes beyond intelligence,
i think,
i believe.
we were so touched by Emily’s gesture and willingness,
we were really groping for words.
we were muted by our emotions, otherwise,
we would be all words and no substance.
trust me on that.



and so i savored the moment
and savored the images of Emily.

to me, Emily is a dream
and a dream that is now a reality.
that is how i would like to see it.
her talent, her fame, her time, her beauty
she shares not only with me,
but with the world, with Baao.
i wanted her to be my F.A.R.M. girl,
because i wanted the kids of Baao to dream,
and dream big.
she is an epitome of dreaming and being the dream.

i am a dreamer and a realist, all rolled in one.
i dream of a beautiful Baao.
as the consummate dreamer i have had to learn to deal with this dilemma:
of having dreams and being realistic.
there is a constant battle for my attention
between my dreams and the pull of life’s reality,
of Baao’s reality.
my dreams typically remain just that, dreams.
life has had to win over the abstract.



this being said, it is my dreams that keep life interesting.
i suppose they would be defined as fantasy in a technical sense
but i do not plan on giving up on them.
it is certainly possible to live in both worlds
providing we keep, as a lot of you would put it,
“our feet on the ground”.

while i may never realize my dreams of Baao,
they have impact far beyond fantasy.
dreams spawn creativity,
allowing us to achieve much more than we could otherwise.
it is the old “shoot for the stars and you may hit the moon” saying.

i think my dreams can allow me an escape
from the drudgery of reality when i need to.
if i dream, i dream big!
and so should you.
we must dream for ourselves,
and not stop there.
we must dream far beyond ourselves,
beyond the confines of our comfort zones.

it is not that i don’t think i could realize many of the dreams
i have chosen not to pursue beyond thought.
like most, i have had to prioritize
what is most important in life
and that is not always following our dreams.
it is what it is.

i cannot shift back to my unreflective mood/mode,
no,
not yet.
i welcome all these tears.
i may sound unbidibidi now,
i assure you,
this is very bidibidi.

D.R.E.A.M.