the little things matter, too

 

the posts reek with despair and grief and of rotting human flesh.  add to that the discontent and dismay!  i cannot keep off my tears.  i cannot avoid the memories that flood my being, bringing back the terror i underwent when my town, baao, was ravaged by a super typhoon, too, back in 2006.  

when i look at the photos of the aftermath, i could only imagine how we looked like then. . . and there are just no words that would dare describe the horror, the misery, the hoplessness.

being spared from this recent devastation, i feel inadequate and i question how i could be of help, i being small (figuratively speaking, i.e., bwahahaha!)and basic.  it led me to thinking that wherever i am today, (i may not be in the next plane of volunteers to tacloban or guian) or you, for that matter, i have done at least one of these simple things:

 gotten out of bed when i could have lingered under my warm sheets. . .

shared a smile, a seat. . .

spoken a kind word, given a pat on the back. . .

offered a little love to someone who needed it, whispered a prayer. . .

and i realize that if i keep doing what i am doing, and do not worry much about what is not done, these little things have big impact, too. 

that i know for sure.  and i am also, already, making a difference.

ps.  as artists here in bicol, we pooled our works together and showed we care, too, however small this act may seem.  fair weather is just that, fair. and life is good!

embracing smallness

youth have always made me rely on the self when presented with choices.  maybe it brings with it the feeling of invincibility.  i guess, one of the gifts of age (aside from wisdom and some grey hair.  bwahahaha!) is the realization that my choices need not be without anchor, no roots.

today, i know this for sure:  my choices are more rooted in truth and acceptance.  

i move with confidence in my smallness, i.e., as opposed to the magnitude of it all, (this explanation was necessary.  bwahahaha!), as i face my loneliness, my excitement, my occasional anxiety and my inabilities.

i find some strength to resist the urge to despise my weaknesses, instead, i bring them all up to you.
there are times when my soul feels frantic, and my list feels long, but during these moments, i take time to listen and remember where my hope springs from.

life is good  and you give me hope!  bwahahaha!