dishevelled soul

if i could sing you my soul songs
and let the notes rise
and ride the stormy breeze
that softly, fiercely caress my face. . .
i would offer them to you
dedicate the tunes to you
because i know
your soul would open up
to receive them,
allow them. . .
their echoes would wrap around you,
enfold and swathe you,
move through you, feel you
and it would be as if
wisps of our souls are entwined, tangled
uniting together
and through this dishevelled soul web
would vibrate, quiver and throb
the spirit of our hearts

laughter. smiles. giggles.

i didn't take a picture of my gift this week.
i couldn't.
i was sitting in the thick of getting prepped for the inaarak group art exhibit, which happened at the cafe des artes, last saturday.
doing it, was surely a gift, but it was kinda hard to hold your sides and a scratched red nikon coolpix at the same time.
so, when i got the pics of the gala opening last saturday, taken by tobmeb of me and my galpals,
i simply knew what my gift was, for the week
and is, for life. . .

this week's gift:
15. a table full of laughter and giggles.

i'm not talking about any old laughter,
i'm talking table poundin', side splittin', belly-achin' laughter.
the kind that lifts you right off the ground and calls for santa to visit pre yule. bwahahaha!

laughter, smiles, and giggles, ok, they don't literally lift chairs off the floor, but surely did my spirit!

contentment. . .hmmmmm. . .

what a totally awesome, splendid, afternoon, yesterday's was.
at the farm. . .

sittin', groovin', on tunes i have forgotten about, well, not really, as i always find myself hummin' 'em. . .
occasionally goin' to my canvass tiles, dippin' my brush on some whimsied colours and paintin'. . .

i never feel more close to the force than on moments like this, when i find myself alone. . .

with my tunes and my paints. . .

as the creative energy flows from my fingertips. . .

and the music winds its tendrils around my heart. . .
healin', rememberin'. . .

i feel i am where i belong. . .
doing what i was created to do!

thank you!

gifts. people. friendships

my recent trip to cebu has certainly, certainly (stress, not a typo) made me more convinced and assured that gifts come in all shapes, sizes, colours and forms.
even before booking my flight to cebu, i already knew i will have fun, but what i had was much, much (stress, not a typo) more than what i expected.

14. shawn perez espina

i have known shawn when i was living in cebu, back in the late 80's, enjoying the freedom one gets earning from a career (more an adventure, for me). i was ready to see the world, armed with a diploma and a working contract from a multi-national, a driver's license, i took the first chance i got to hop to an island. and it was cebu.

shawn was then an intern, fresh from med school. my job was with a pharma co, so all my friends and acquaintances were in that circle. those times are but a blurr now, but one thing remains clear in my memory and that is, shawn was a good friend, and i was right, he was and still is. but what surprised me more, is that shawn and i also share the same passion, now: painting and farming.

thank you, shawn, for the hospitality and the kindness.

15. jenjen, rachel, alan

cervini and eliazo

if i would be given a second chance to go to college again and live the college life again, i, without batting an eyelash, would pick to live in eliazo hall. dorm life at eliazo was simply the best, and being neighbours with cervini is an additional treat! bwahahaha!

i had dinner with alan, jenjen and rachel, on my first night in cebu. actually, this trip was like going down nostalgia lane. so when the four of us had dinner at abaseria, there was no avoiding that route. bwahahaha! it was so much fun to reminisce and make fun of our own experiences (well, not ours alone. we did talk about other people's, too. bwahahaha).

thanks, jenjen, alan and rachel for the shared memories and laughter.

16. marilou, chinqui, sandy, zeny, ellen,(lilit, majo and rudjen)& i

roommates reunite!

that is how the headline should be. the reason why i went to cebu is to meet up with my roommates! after 27 years! oh, my! after college, we somehow lost contact with each other, but fate would have it that after 27 years, we will meet up and see each other again, in cebu.

it was such a happy reunion!

ellen came all the way from new york, sandy came from manila, zeny from cagayan de oro,

marilou is based in cebu, so she hosted our sumptuous dinner (crabs flown all the way from surigao and cakes flown all the way from butuan, what a jetset of a feast! bwahahaha!)

and chinqui, who is of this moment in cebu, was gracious enough to initiate and make this reunion possible. i know lilit, who flew in from london, would have joined us, but was kept from doing so because of some urgent matter. rudjen will know about our reunion in sfo and of course majo, too, soon, in paris. and i, i had to take a 7-hour bus trip, stay overnight in manila, fly to cebu, to attend this important reunion. and i would not have missed it for the world.

the moment we saw each other again, after 27 years, was precious. memories, laughter, dreams. . .these things and more, pervaded our conversation.

the food at cyma was ignored, not because it was no good, but because we were so excited to see each other, we could hardly take a bite.

we then had coffee and more stories, walked our way to marriott and i met, for the first time, ellen's beautiful kids.

after the dinner at marilou's, we bunked with sandy at the shangri-la, and true enough, it was a remote place and what made it a paradise (at least for me) was the fact that i was with my roommates.

room 202 and room 204.

after this, my recent trip to cebu, i know, without any doubt, that the people i meet, the friendships we create are not by chance but rather, by design. . .

and i submit.

this is your life

recently saw this and i must re-post.
life is good! live it!

beyond my wildest dream

it was yesterday morning. i found myself smiling while strolling along the newly re-landscaped rosario's path, that leads to the heart of la huerta. i cannot help admiring how fast inggay and my don bosco students learned of how i wanted the path to look and feel like, worked and planted and arranged my irises and caladiums. . . and yesterday morning, i found myself smiling while moseying along the newly re-landscaped rosario's path.

it is a short, winding and meandering plumeria-lined trail (contrary to the banal, trite, prosaic and cliched 'matuwid na daan', i purposely had this 'daan' crooked, just to state my case. bwahahaha!). the flat stone leaf-shaped steps have not been installed, they will soon be, so i found myself leisurely walking on the soft and rich dark earth of the promenade. it felt totally glorious, to realize that i have conquered this part of heaven, at least, that is how i look at it.

my arms were outstretched, to reach for the verdant leaves, beckoning for my avian friends to perch on them. and oh, the things i heard! softened by the coolness of the morning farm air, i could hear children and a dog playing in the distance, the birds were singing their early morning tunes, an invitation to their flights! my senses were heightened as if i had finally come into harmony with the universe. each movement, each thought found its place in the tapestry that was being woven on that day, right before my very eyes, and it was still early in the morning.

i am pleased to say, that my gift from that experience, is the gift of being at total peace and the contentment in the moment.

and as i am busy pounding on my lappy's keys right this very moment, i still asked myself what to be grateful for, today. and it dawned on me that a better question stands: is there anything that i should not be grateful for? for even in the moments that are not as peaceful as yesterday morning's, they are a gift, for i cannot know peace and contentment and joy without the occasional absence of those things.

so this is the gift:
13. the present. and the ability to revel in it.

and then i heard it: pssssst, pssssst. . . i turned my head, afraid to see who is not there. . . but i did. . . and i saw joy! (and that is another gift entry for the morrow. bwahahaha!)

just do it!

my favourite line is: just do it!

i do not wait for the other shoe to drop. waiting for it is a lack of faith: in the force, in love, in goodness and in the self. the older i get (and wiser, i wish. bwahahaha), the more i am convinced that a person can live fearlessly! (different from carelessly). and i believe that living fearlessly is the only way that i can experience all the flavours and nuances of life, everyday.

on a personal level, i know i have been given the strength to come through whatever comes my way. i believe in L.O.V.E., and i am not afraid to put it out there for the world to know.

when i tell you that i love you, i tell you, so that you will know that you are never alone. that i see the goodness in you and that i see myself in you.

i will not be afraid to love you. what have i got to lose?


ps: john 3:16