i wake up alone

i wake up alone. . .
it is still early,
my birds have not started to chirp,
so it must still be dark.
i close my eyes again
and try to go back to sleep,
but sleep eludes me. . .
i stay awake,
with my eyes closed,
trying to persuade
these invasive thoughts to leave me. . .
but i fail and i suffer,
in silence,
in darkness,
alone. . .

being alone is a reality i deal with often,
well,
actually,
everyday. . .
i almost always win
to make myself think it does not matter,
but there are times that i just succumb
and let this reality take its toll on me. . .
and let these tears fall,
and pine for the warmth of a company.

but this does not happen often. . .

rarely, even.